Thoughts on 36

I would sit next to
CJ
while my mother
visited her father
A man I never
knew as my
grandfather
We share a birthday
separated by years
He passed away before I
was born
He never knew me either
My mother would sit
beside his grave
and cry
And I would draw CJ
pictures and
trace the angel wings
engraved into his
stone
He only lived four
months
My uncle’s first son
One year I left one
of my balloons with
him
But it didn’t feel right
To be celebrating the
day I was born
while visiting people
who never would
have another
birthday
To be celebrating with CJ
who never made it to
his first
I guess maybe that’s why
I have no interest
in celebrating it now
Why it maybe became just
another day to
me
There’s always been
an underlying current
of sadness that runs
through my birthday
My thoughts tend to drift
to the two people I
grew up sharing my
day with
but never knowing
either of them
I don’t know where I’m
really going with
this
These are just the thoughts
I am having on
turning
36

Advertisements

7 thoughts on “Thoughts on 36

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s